Key insights from Dr Peter Vermeulen’s Perth workshop
What if we looked beyond what a child is doing and asked ourselves why?
This was one of the important ideas explored during Dr Peter Vermeulen’s recent autism workshops in Perth. His work encourages parents, teachers and professionals to look beyond behaviour and consider how an autistic child may be perceiving, processing and making sense of the world around them.
Dr Vermeulen’s approach to autism places a strong focus on context, predictability, clarity and understanding the individual child. His work highlights that autism cannot be understood through behaviour or diagnosis alone. Instead, we need to consider the person, their environment, expectations and individual way of processing information.
For parents and teachers, this can provide a useful shift in perspective. Instead of simply asking, “How do I stop this behaviour?”, we can start asking, “What is this child experiencing, and what might help them make sense of what is happening?”
1. Look beyond the behaviour
When a child refuses, becomes overwhelmed, avoids an activity or says “no”, it can be tempting to see the behaviour as the problem.
But behaviour is communication.
A child may be trying to communicate that something is confusing, unpredictable, overwhelming, difficult, boring, uncomfortable or simply not meaningful to them.
Before assuming a child is being oppositional or unmotivated, try asking:
• What happened immediately before this?
• Does the child understand what is being asked?
• Is the activity predictable?
• Is there something about the environment that is making this difficult?
• Does the child know what will happen next?
• Is there a way to make the task more meaningful?
Understanding the “why” can change the way we respond.
2. Remember that Autism is not the whole child
A diagnosis can help us understand a child’s needs, but it should never become the only lens through which we see them.
Children are still children. They have personalities, interests, preferences, strengths, relationships, worries and individual needs.
It is important to consider which needs may relate to autism and which are simply part of being a child.
Rather than asking, “What does an autistic child need?”, ask:
“What does this child need?”
That shift helps us create support that is genuinely individualised.
3. Clarity and predictability can create a sense of safety
One of the key ideas explored by Dr Vermeulen is the importance of predictability and clarity.
For some autistic children, uncertainty can be particularly challenging. When the brain has limited information about what is happening, what is expected or what will happen next, an ordinary situation can become much harder to navigate.
Providing clear information can reduce some of that uncertainty.
Try telling children:
• Where they are going
• Who will be there
• What they will be doing
• How long it will last
• What will happen afterwards
• What they can do if they need help
Rather than simply saying, “We’re going somewhere later,” you might say:
“After lunch, we are going to the library. We will drive there, choose some books and then come home. We will leave the library after you have chosen three books.”
Clarity can bring calm when uncertainty is creating stress.
4. Push the “context button”
One of the memorable concepts from Dr Vermeulen’s work is the importance of context.
Something that seems obvious to one person may not be obvious to another.
We often rely on context without realising it. Facial expressions, tone of voice, location, previous experiences and subtle changes in a situation can all influence how we interpret what is happening.
For a child who does not automatically pick up on these contextual clues, we may need to make the information more explicit.
Instead of simply saying:
“That’s not appropriate.”
Try explaining:
“At school, we use quiet voices in the library because other people are reading.”
Rather than assuming a child knows why something has changed, explain what is different and why.
This is what it can mean to “push the context button” and make information that may normally remain unspoken more visible.
5. Make open-ended activities more predictable
“Free time” sounds relaxing, but an open-ended activity can actually be difficult for some autistic children.
If a child does not know what they are expected to do, how long the activity will last or when it will finish, they may feel uncertain and hard to transition.
Instead of simply saying, “Go and play,” try narrowing down the possibilities.
For example:
“You have 20 minutes before dinner. You can build with LEGO or draw. When dinner is ready, I’ll let you know.”
This keeps some autonomy while providing structure.
6. Offer choices, but keep them manageable
Choice can give children a sense of autonomy, but too many choices can create another problem: more uncertainty.
Try offering two or three realistic options rather than an unlimited list.
For example:
• “Do you want to get dressed before or after breakfast?”
• “Would you like to do your homework at the kitchen table or at your desk?”
• “Would you like to start with reading or maths?”
Not everything can be a choice. Children still have responsibilities and routines that need to happen.
The goal is to look for places where genuine autonomy can be added within the boundaries that already exist.
7. Make transitions more concrete
Transitions can be particularly challenging when children do not know exactly when one activity will finish and another will begin.
A timer does not always solve this.
Consider the difference between:
“Five more minutes of gaming.”
And:
“You can finish this level, then the game goes off and we are getting ready for dinner.”
The second version connects the transition to something meaningful and concrete.
Where possible, make the beginning and end of an activity clear.
8. Don’t remove every challenge. provide tools to manage it
Being autism-friendly does not mean removing every obstacle or making everything easy.
Children also need opportunities to develop skills, experience small challenges and discover that they can cope.
The important part is providing the right support.
For example, if waiting is difficult, the solution does not always need to be skipping the queue. Instead, consider what could make waiting more manageable:
• A small activity
• A quiz or game
• A visual plan
• Something connected to the child’s interests
• A clear explanation of what will happen next
The environment can be adapted without removing every opportunity for participation.
9. Use interests as a bridge to learning
Children’s interests can be powerful tools for connection, learning and engagement.
If a child loves trains, dinosaurs, Minecraft, animals or sport, look for ways to incorporate those interests into other activities.
For example, a strong interest in dinosaurs could become a way to practise:
• Reading
• Writing
• Maths
• Social interaction
• Research skills
• Problem solving
Rather than trying to move a child away from their interests, we can sometimes use those interests as a bridge into new experiences.
10. Connect activities to meaningful outcomes
Children are often more motivated when they can see why something matters.
Instead of simply asking a child to “help with dinner”, give them a meaningful role.
They might wash the vegetables, cut soft foods with appropriate supervision or help prepare part of the meal.
The task becomes connected to a real outcome:
“We made this together, it tastes great.”
Small contributions can create genuine feelings of competence, participation and achievement.
11. Celebrate progress, not perfection
Children do not need to be compared with their classmates, siblings or peers.
A more useful question is:
“What can they do today that was harder yesterday?”
Try creating a simple “success jar” at home or in the classroom. Throughout the week, add examples of things the child has achieved, attempted or worked hard at.
At the end of the week, look back together.
Success might be:
• Trying a new food
• Asking for help
• Joining an activity
• Recovering after becoming upset
• Trying again after making a mistake
• Helping someone else
• Completing part of a difficult task
These moments matter.
12. Model mistakes and imperfection
Children do not need adults to demonstrate perfection, it can feel frustrating.
In fact, showing children that adults make mistakes too can be incredibly valuable.
Try saying:
“Oops, I made a mistake. That’s okay. I’ll have another go.”
This can help normalise mistakes and demonstrate that getting something wrong does not mean we have failed.
13. Look for what makes your child feel good
Supporting regulation is not only about identifying what overwhelms a child. It is also about discovering what helps them feel comfortable, connected and happy.
Ask:
• What activities does my child enjoy?
• Where do they feel most comfortable?
• Who do they enjoy spending time with?
• What helps them recover after a difficult moment?
• What makes them feel successful?
• What makes them feel calm and connected?
You could create a simple “good feelings box” with pictures, objects or ideas representing things that help your child feel good.
This can also help parents and teachers understand the child from their perspective, rather than focusing only on behaviours that adults find challenging.
14. Encourage participation without creating avoidance
Supporting a child does not mean forcing them through every situation, but it also does not mean automatically removing every difficult experience.
For example, a child may want to attend a social activity but become overwhelmed.
Could they attend for a shorter period? Could they have a quiet space available? Could they know in advance how they can ask for a break? Exit strategy if needed.
This provides support while still creating opportunities for participation.
Activities with clear rules and structure, such as some sports and games, may also provide helpful frameworks for social participation.
15. When a child says “no”, pause before pushing harder
A “no” can mean many different things.
Instead of immediately repeating the demand, try to understand what is behind the refusal.
Could the task be:
• Too unclear?
• Too difficult?
• Too boring?
• Too unpredictable?
• Too overwhelming?
• Disconnected from the child’s interests?
Sometimes a small change can make a big difference.
You might clarify the benefit, introduce some novelty, offer a limited choice or turn the task into a game.
The goal is not to remove every demand. It is to make expectations clearer and support the child to engage with them.
16. Give children opportunities to help others
One of the important ideas discussed in the workshop was the value of meaningful contribution and feeling needed and connected at a human level.
Children can experience a genuine sense of happiness and achievement when they know they have helped someone else.
Look for age-appropriate ways your child can contribute at home, school or in the community.
They might help set the table, feed a pet, assist a younger sibling, organise classroom materials or help with a shared project.
These are not simply chores. They can provide opportunities for connection, purpose and competence.
Supporting neurodivergent children starts with understanding
Perhaps the biggest takeaway from Dr Peter Vermeulen’s Perth workshops was the importance of trying to see the world from the child’s perspective.
When a child perceives and processes the world differently, they may also respond to that world differently.
That does not mean we need to remove every challenge or expectation. Instead, we can provide the clarity, predictability, context, autonomy and support that help children understand what is happening and participate in their own way.
As parents, teachers and professionals, we can keep asking:
What does this child need to understand this situation?
What could make this more predictable?
What would help them feel successful?
How can we support them without losing sight of who they are as a person?
Because supporting an autistic or neurodivergent child is not about changing who they are. It is about understanding how they experience the world and creating environments where they can participate, connect, learn and thrive.
For more information visit Peters website where he offers a great range of free and paid tools to support neurodivergent individuals.
Supporting your child in Perth
At Prosper Health Collective, our Occupational Therapists, Speech Pathologists and Psychologists work alongside children, families and schools using individualised, neuroaffirming approaches.
If you would like support understanding your child’s individual needs, developing practical strategies or working with your child’s school, our team can help.
Learn more about our child and family services at Prosper Health Collective.
This article was inspired by key concepts discussed during Dr Peter Vermeulen’s September 2026 Perth workshops. It is intended as general educational information and is not a substitute for individual assessment or professional advice.